Marriage Moats- Widen My View

Published: Fri, 08/31/12

Marriage Moats

Caring for Marriage

The other day I had a conversation with an attorney. He has many years of experience in court, and the testimony of witnesses. He said that two people can swear on the Bible to tell the truth, and still come up with gaping discrepancies in their experience of the same crime. It can take days or weeks and a price tag with four zeros to untangle the facts, and even then the jury may be hung.

This jives with my own life. I may describe an evening as more feisty than a bathtub full of crabs, while John felt it was civil. When I compare notes with my siblings about our childhood, there are contradictions. I think we moved from California to Connecticut as an adventure. My brother may know that it was because our father was ousted. How is it that two people can have such disparate takes?

The story of the six blind men and the elephant comes to mind. No one was wrong. They were merely standing in different places.

3d movies are becoming popular. It is remarkable that two images, incomplete in themselves, can join forces to give a deeper picture. When John and I find ourselves out of sync in our perspective, I am trying to remember that this is not an issue of right vs wrong. Rather it is a rich opportunity to widen my understanding.

Photo by Andy Sullivan

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