He looks official. I am not sure if his badge identifies him as an FBI agent, or an undercover detective. I remember playing cops and robbers with my brother when we were little. We made badges out of cardboard and crayons, and promoted ourselves to a higher rank than Regular Kid. 

 

While I confess to a sudden intake of air when I see a patrol car slide in behind me on the turnpike, and an anxious assessment of my speedometer, I like policemen. If I am in a sketchy part of town, it is a relief to see one. When Benjamin was lost last summer I hugged the officer who helped find him.

 

They provide me with an external reminder to obey the rules. This is painless if I am already cruising below the speed limit, or have made a full stop at the sign at the bottom of my road. But If I am edging on 75 mph, or have not stopped completely I am annoyed to see a police car. It does not matter who he or she is, or if they intend to give me a ticket, my own conscience kicks in and I get agitated. 

 

But if I unpack it, the reminder to slow down, or stop at the stop sign is actually in my own best interests. John was driving in Tampa when someone ran a stop sign and totaled our first car. Taking turns is a nifty way to avoid such calamities. Still I can be short sighted enough to hurl my blame at the rules, or the rule keepers, instead of my own careless driving. 

 

There are rules that help keep marriages from crashing. One of them is to not spend more time socializing with coworkers than with your own spouse. Some people balk at such a restriction. But perhaps the irritation comes more from a grating conscience than from the guideline. 

 

When I was in college the speed limit was 55, and I remember a billboard that said "Stay Alive, Drive 55."

 

Maybe someday there will be billboards with marriage saving taglines. 

 

"Save Your Kisses for Your Mrs."

 

"Don't Be a Jerk by Flirting at Work"

 

Because it helps in avoiding calamities.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photo by Photobooththing.com

you can support us at

www.caringformarriage.org