It is their turn to be the center of the known universe.

 

I like the system, really. For a window of time the couple is the focus of everyone's attention. They get all the presents, all the well wishes, all the kisses and the best seats at the reception. Everyone who knows them is pouring money and affection into them, to launch them on a lifelong journey. Then next Saturday it is someone else's turn. 

 

There are enough days to go around, even when two couples get married on the same one, because there are enough friends and family to go around.

 

The reason it works is because it is an investment. We give lavishly from a core belief that the couple will turn around and give back.

 

Mathematically, it is ingenious. Christen pairs of people who will forever more contribute to the lives of their children, family and communities. That creates an ever expanding circle of generosity. 

 

I personally have been the beneficiary of many wonderful marriages over the years: Nathan and Elise, Frank and Louise, Larry and Midge, Glenn and Mary, Peter and Roxanne, Aven and David, Kay and Mark, Rob and Susie, Calvin and Maggie, Rachel and Oliver, Elaine and Reed, Michael and Gwenda are some of the host. What is more amazing, there are scads of people who have those exact names on their owns lists too. If I were to try to quantify it, most of those couples have blessed me with time that actually boils down to a week or three. Maybe a month, if you could concentrate it like orange juice. An hour here, a conversation there, a note in the mail, a phone call, an evening by the fire. Yet the staying power of those connections, tethered together, has sustained John and me across the decades with no expiration in sight.

 

Being supported by those mentors empowers us to give as well. The offerings are modest... an email, a dinner when the new baby comes, a conversation after church, a text, a Google hang out. But they seem to have figured out that we love them: Solomon and Tirah, Bronwen and Jer, Jennica and Calebe, Sarah and Chris, Alison and Greg, Nathan and Michele, Louis and Kelly, Gwynne and Steve, Lukas and Amy, Stella and Michael, Erin and Nathan, Keith and Monica, Jenny and Steve.

 

I don't think there is a bank on the planet with such opulent returns.