Marriage Moats-Abundance
Published: Sat, 03/05/11
| Marriage Moats | Caring for Marriage |
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![]() They have enough.
Right now, in this moment neither is worried about the economy, or a deadline, or getting to work next week. They have abundance.
The messages we are bombarded with about space and time and money can create parsimonious tendencies. The world warns us that there is never enough, and the person next to you eking more space on the subway means you have less room. The employee across the hall landing a raise means you will probably risk a cut in pay. But those measurements are oblivious to a whole new dimension. When you keep your eyes at dirt level, you cannot even see the sky.
Abundance is a different reality, one that does not allow itself to be constricted by clocks and square footage. If you are in a snowy field, enjoying the sunset, your joy is not diminished in the slightest by another person, or dozens of persons enjoying it too. Your happiness, which has already filled you to the brim, would somehow increase, if you were to catch the eyes of someone else, whose name you will never know, enjoying the peachy light too. There is abundance.
If you are unselfconsciously singing to your children while you eat lunch at a food court, and suddenly a hundred people around you burst into the Hallelujah Chorus, your pleasure expands, rather than divides. I saw it happen on You Tube and it made me cry. I wasn't even there, but there was enough joy for the 31 million people who have watched it since last November. There is abundance.
Sometimes we get stuck on the bottom floor of marriage. We believe the appearance of limited resources, and we shrivel up in the scarcity. But when we remember to look up, we behold the expanse around and above us. Just now my little boy came to me with his hurt toe. I asked if he needed a kiss. He said "Lots of kisses." There was no need to be stingy. Whenever my lips pucker, there is another waiting to be given. There is abundance. The other day my husband was giving his attention to a friend. I could have felt possessive, like the kindness he was spending elsewhere would somehow lessen his supply for me. I started to go in that direction, whining about the conversation... which was boring. Then I remembered to look up. I saw John as a kind man, listening to a person who is unemployed and lonely. It increased my respect for John, and I felt a rush of gratitude to be married to a man who feels compassion. There is abundance.
Our firstborn son is getting married today. The joy that he and his
bride feel will ripple through the crowd gathered and will multiply to
fill the hearts that are present. It will not get smaller with each
person who comes for a piece of pleased, it will grow. May it be the birth of a marriage blessed by abundance.
Photo by Chara Odhner www.caringformarriage.org
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