Yeats says that "To understand is to love."

 

I know it feels incredibly good to toss a feeling to John, and have him catch it. Sometimes it is spoken, other times it is in a glance, like last night. Benjamin was trying to apologize to me for his angry outburst, and he actually folded his hands and asked me to please, please forgive him. He did not go down on his knees, but it sure reminded me of the apology Anne Shirley made to Rachel Lynde in Anne of Green Gables. The humorous part for me, was that although Anne was saturated in drama... Benjamin meant it from the bottom of his heart. Looking over his little penitent head at John and bouncing smiles between us made the whole scene worth the wear and tear on my nerves. Don't tell Benjamin though. It may not work twice.

 

Having someone who listens is one of the blessings marriage is designed to include. We don't always manage to figure out how, but it is what God had in mind when He invented it.

 

I suppose if we were better studies in the art of full attention, we would slide to the top of the Marital Success Scale and we could all go home. But most of us find ways to complicate something that is actually pretty simple.

 

Look at this series of photographs. 

 

1.One girl talks and the other listens.

2.The second girl talks and her sister listens. 

3.They both feel good. 

 

Fortunately we get lots of chances to get it right. 365 per year on average, unless you spend part of every year in solitary confinement.

 

And as Anne also said, "Today is fresh, with no mistakes yet."

 

Try to listen to the person you love as if you want to understand. You will both feel good. 

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