Marriage Moats-Which Part Do You Mean?
Published: Thu, 02/17/11
| Marriage Moats | Caring for Marriage |
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 You know from experience that each of these pieces is part of a single structure. You even know the name of that structure without me telling you. You understand, at least theoretically, that the whole depends on each part, and that they work harmoniously in spite of disparate materials and functions. If you watch a bicycle in action, at any moment the pedals turn in rhythm, but in opposition. Spokes spin, ever flinging their points away from the hub. The chain grinds along, or hums depending on its maintenance schedule, with the higher half flying in the reverse direction of the bottom. Even the brake pads are all about friction.
"I want to keep going!" shouts the wheel.
"I say stop." Squeeeeze.
Sometimes I feel like I am flaky for having clashing feelings on different days. Thursday I am giddy with affection for John. Friday I am annoyed about the chores not done. Saturday I am thrilled because he fixed the dishwasher. Sunday I am anxious about our future. If anyone were tracking me they might conclude that I am a tad inconsistent. Once I was feeling like home life was nearly perfect. The kids were playing well, dinner was cooking, the house was clean. John wrote up a quick description of this and had me sign it.
A few days later I was steeped in chaos... crying baby, spilled toys, no supper in sight. I said, "Life is always terrible!"
John whipped out my signature and showed me.
"A forgery," I muttered.
I heard a saying about the weather in Colorado. If at any time you are unhappy with it, wait ten minutes. It will change.
I suppose that fits for some marriages too.
There is fear and grief in all love... fear that it will perish and grief if it does.
- Married love 371, Emanuel Swedenborg
Photo by Caleb Kerr www.caringformarriage.org
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