Marriage Moats-Spaces

Published: Sat, 09/18/10

Marriage Moats

Caring for Marriage

I like the spaces in this picture.

The shapes between her hair are like dancing crescent moons, or slices of fleshy white pear.

The space beneath her throat is like an albino trout, sneakily swallowing up her head. Her arms fade into the nothingness around her, like she is part of a dream I am still having.

Even her teeth use up no pixels, compared to the hollow behind them that is dark with the sound of her laughter.

It is easy to heed what takes up ink on a page. It is more challenging to give credence to what is absent.

When I am fretting with the problems that stand in my way like boxwood hedges in a garden maze, it takes effort to observe the emptiness that allows free passage. I may be blind to what is not there, even though it is as real as what is.

Once I was stewing about the hours John was spending at work, when a friend expressed anxiety over her husband's unemployment. Joblessness was a space I had forgotten to notice.

Another time I was sulking about our son's tantrums, when another mother told me her daughter was having daily seizures. I had not considered the absence of that concern in my life.

What are the myriad difficulties that stand like gaping holes in your horizon, because they are not there?

Are they the windows that let you reach the sky?

Photo by Andy Sullivan