It may seem like a small thing. Being understood. But my gut tells me that there is the potential for both connection and healing in this modest bridge. 

 

Most people who know Benjamin are aware of his fandom status for Toy Story. He has dressed up like Woody for eight Halloweens, and when he met Buzz at Disneyland he bounced like a kid on a pogo stick. We have conversations about Sid's choices, and where his deviousness landed him. Ben can quote entire swaths of the dialogue, and recently commented that Toy Story 4 did not have a villain. Even Gabby Gabby, who goes to great lengths to rob Woody of his voicebox, only wanted to be adopted by a little girl. She believed that having a voice would make her lovable. Benjamin understood her longing, and that made it possible to forgive her. Even though she had been naughty. 

 

Feeling understood reminds me of a plane landing. Your emotions and musings circle around awhile in your head, as you may or may not try to express them. Then when someone you trust offers evidence of hearing them, it allows you to come down from the gyrating thoughts and rest. 

 

The circumstances may not have changed. The rent is still due. Your child is still feverish. The laundry is still staring at you. Mocking, really. But you feel understood. Which is a great relief. 

 

In the presence of a voice, we are less likely to be naughty. In the end we all just want to be loved.