One of the most pivotal influences on my mothering was an organization called La Leche League. I started going to meetings when I was pregnant with my first child, and continued for twenty three years in four states. Most springs there were conferences to shore up both the education around breastfeeding, and a sense of community. These appealed to me, plus of course the friendships that have continued long after I dried up. I even published a few articles in publications like Mothering and Welcome Home.

 

Somewhere after my second child arrived, along with a fledgling sense of competence with having done it twice, a friend suggested that I apply to become a leader. 

 

This surprised me. After all I was still a newbie and hadn't even graduated from the chapter called Diapers. I used cloth ones, with wool covers called soakers, which I hear may have made a comeback. I had not even successfully weaned anyone, since the two were tandem nursing. 

 

But the notion stuck, and I began the process which included copious reading, and writing out my birth stories and nursing experience.

 

By the time my third child was born, I was accredited. It began a satisfying involvement with women who were committed to this mayhem called motherhood. Those relationships, and the personal growth they engendered changed the trajectory of our family. My participation did a lot to bolster a sense of connection. Plus I laughed more when I might have slumped. 

 

This month I have suggested to a clutch of people that they consider joining a mentoring quartet. The prospect is much more modest than becoming a La Leche League Leader. It does not demand a written biography, and has no required reading, though I have a bulging shelf of marriage books should the interest appear. I am so bold as to believe that even as modest a commitment of an hour a month for half a year can impact a relationship in ways that will endure into the future. Plus I am pretty sure you will laugh more.