Marriage Moats- Prep
Published: Wed, 07/17/19
| Prep | Caring for Marriage |
 Photo by Chara Smith
Preparation is part of my routine. Before I give a speech I practice that talk perhaps a hundred times: driving in the car, folding laundry, while I do dishes. Prior to my students arriving for sewing class I have already spent time buying fabric, threading the machines, and planning new projects. I have heard teachers say that they spend as much time preparing as they do with the children.
How much time does anyone log in in the anticipation of marriage? The engagement period is a welcome opportunity to read together, get premarital counseling, start making joint decisions. That translates to perhaps a year of lead time for fifty years of marriage. But what about the possibility for pushing it even further back?
The subjects that have been part of my life long after graduation could become part of the standard curriculum. Cooperation, listening, forgiveness and compassion are all skills that can be practiced with intentionality.
A friend used to teach a class on conflict management. People had to sign up, cough up bucks and rush over on their lunch break. They said it impacted their lives.
I have taken workshops from educators who teach relationship tools in high schools and colleges. Kids appear to enjoy it. John and I have put one toe in that door too, being guest speakers in classes where we invite students to practice communication techniques. Seventeen years ago we invited college aged people into our home for weekly discussions about preparing for marriage.
Then we said, "It has been great. We are having twins next week so this group is over."
But they replied, "We don't want to stop. We will do dishes and help clean if you will keep going."
So we did. Those people are precious to me still.
Love,
Lori |
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