Hence the would be well wisher was diverted to voicemail. When I again had it in my hands i called him back. We had a pleasant chat about our parallel ages, and he asked what I was up to. I mentioned my enthusiasm about the mentoring program. He expressed his support in a wistful voice.

 

"What advice would you give to a younger couple?" I asked gently. 

 

"Not to interrupt. Talking isn't that easy for me, and I don't say a lot, but when I do I get cut off mid sentence. It feels as if I am not important. She doesn't even bother to say "excuse me," just a jet launch into her own thoughts. Sometimes it seems like I am an empty hole. The kids do it too now. Weekends are hard. I look forward to Mondays so I can go back to work."

 

I thought with angst about how even his phone call had been cut off, and was enormously glad I had called back. 

 

It does not seem like an unreasonable request. We simply crave the space to be listened to, and valued. I decided on the spot to devote one of our mentoring sessions to good listening.

 

Not only that I think I will call my friend again soon. Just to listen.