In a conversation over lunch, a friend expressed to me what she said to a woman going through a difficult patch.

"You are capable."

What a marvelous message to convey to someone who is probably feeling insecure. Having someone who believes in you can be the moonlight you need to ascend out of the valley. 

There have been times I have conveyed the converse of that sentiment. When bringing a meal to a young mom who was exhausted, I packed all the nutrition I could into a tupperware container. Although I did not say the words, I am embarrassed to admit that I was anxious for her. Her husband was disconnected and she was basically single parenting. I smiled weakly as I left the soup and cobbler on the table, but in my heart the odds felt overwhelming. How would she cope?

Then I caught myself. No one wants pity, especially someone whose circumstances are dire. I said a prayer, walking back to my car, for her and her small children. 

"Oh Lord, please give her the wisdom to care for her family, and please let me be part of her support team. Bless her, and keep them safe."

It felt lighter, choosing to believe in her rather than expecting her to fail. As time played out, her path has been rocky. Yet she finds joy even in the shadows. I have never brought her a meal since, but I have prayed for her. 

Maybe it matters.