John is not one of those men who itches for a good construction project. He has crafted some awesome raised beds atop chicken coops for me in recent years, but it was because he loves me. Not because he craves working with wood. He also designed A frame holders for the name tags at church which make it easy to grab your lanyard as you walk in. 

My father had a workshop with all the tools lined up on little hooks, and he worked with my brother to create cool things. But it is not John's go to activity on a Saturday morning.

Our firstborn did not know this. 

At the age of eight Lukas got an idea that he held on to like a bulldog. He wanted to make an airplane swing for his little sisters for Christmas. I am not sure if he saw one in a catalog, or dreamed it up on his own, but my memory is that John was reluctant. It seemed too ambitious. Yet saying no only made Lukas more determined.  

Fortunately I was exempt from any expectation to help since fabric was not involved. Still I was curious. After a string of noisy afternoons in the garage, things started to take shape. By golly, it was an airplane swing. They painted it red. It was the highlight of Christmas morning. 

The next year Lukas designed something to hold his brother's baseball and bat. It was really quite clever. Then came a desk with holes for the crayons and an attached bench. Looking back I am even more astonished at his generosity.

Now Lukas has his own tools, which he keeps meticulously clean and in order. They are for installing speakers, and flat screens rather than building toys. But I wonder if those hours with his father were a beginning. 

Having children can niggle you into trying things you never would on your own. Perhaps niggle is too soft a term. More like shove. 

Spouses too, can leave you no option but to find out that you can be more patient than you would have predicted. More committed than you believed possible. More resourceful than you have been to date.

And definitely more generous.