There were more social engagements this month than usual. I had the chance to chat with small groups of friends over lemonade and cookies on multiple days. One of the things I noticed was how well people listen to one another. Or don't.
A friend began to say where her family was going for vacation.
"We
leave on Saturday for the mountains!"
She looked like she was building up steam in her excitement. But another woman cut her off after only one sentence.
"We are going to the shore. It has been three years since we went and the kids are super happy about it." The first woman's mouth didn't even get a chance to close before she was cut off.
Another time the conversation was about
sports.
"My son is in two soccer leagues. Getting him..."
"Are you kidding? Mine is in three! Our calendar looks like a train schedule and since my husband travels it is always me who drives him there." The first person fell silent. She had been upstaged.
The phenomenon reminds me of a phrase my dad once warned me about.
"That reminds me of me." He had a degree in counseling and
if there was one legacy he was bent on leaving us it was the art of an open ear.
It felt safe to talk with him. He knew how to look at me as if I were the only thing that mattered. I guess that was why people showed up to be heard in the privacy of his office. Or after church. One time our family was out to dinner and he listened so intently to a waitress she began to cry. I was thirteen and kind of embarrassed, but then again I still remember
it.
My prayer is that I can be like him. As a matter of fact, he still lets me do all the talking.