Marriage is designed to make sure someone has your back.
It would be complicated for God to be there to rescue all of us in every circumstance, especially considering how partial He is to anonymity. Not that He would mind us knowing that it is always Him who protects us... it is we grown ups that seem to have an insatiable
desire for autonomy. So He invented spouses. And friends.
I have a neighbor facing hip replacement surgery. Think he would let me offer to bring a meal? Not a chance. If I arrive at the door with a casserole he will probably leap from the couch and offer me tea, apologizing that there is no peach pie. Children are not so particular. They accept support like there is no tomorrow, because for them, life is about today.
A few years ago when Winter
took her job more seriously, my twins were getting ready to go out in the snow and I asked why Aurelle was wearing shoes instead of boots.
"I left them at school."
"But I am going to make big footprints for her to step in," her booted sister assured me.
Kids are comfortable with help, which makes it much easier to help them. Marriage seems to be a plot for breaking through that invincible shield, making it
possible to admit to yourself and another human being that you are vincible.
One February it was snowy and I realized that I would have to drive in it. My thoughts went something like this.
"I will go up the less steep road, but if I get stuck, I will call John. He will shovel out the car, and I will drive behind in his tire tracks."
John likes rescuing me. I like being rescued.
But for
those of you who are sticklers for equanimity, rest assured. When we are in a social situation it is me who does the blazing. John does not thrive on chit chat, and marvels that I can remember not only the coworker's name but her husband's name, their children's names and random details like their oldest son's recent graduation. John will willingly follow along in my verbal footprints.
I think it is much nicer than standing
alone.
