Last week my twins were in charge of feeding the neighbor's cat. They let her out each day, and brought her back in, filled her food dish and freshened the water. Sometimes they just enjoyed having the cat rub her downy fur against their bare summertime legs. Other mornings they went from a sense of duty. The real owners were at the beach and were anxious that she be well cared for.

The next week the girls looked after our renter's cat. He does not go outside, so they needed to deal with the litter box, as well as food. 

I am already mindful of when we go away next October for our daughter's wedding. Fortunately the couple in our apartment have taken to chickens, and have already immersed themselves in the details of locking up coops, letting them free range, luring them back in with bread crumbs. We have watched the miracle of new life as it emerges in the incubator, and held the scrawny chicks in our cupped palms. I feel calmer knowing they will be here to keep the flock safe. 

A woman who had lost any sense of love for her husband told me about her inner strife. She felt clear that he was not hers and she was definitely not his true partner. Yet they had four children together, and did not believe in divorce. So she plodded. 

One answer to her prayers was that while she would not be married to him in heaven, someone would. And she could be a faithful companion for him now. She hoped that her own true love would also have an earthly wife to share the journey with, and she felt grateful to her, whoever she was. It gave the effort meaning, getting her out of what felt like a deep rut. 

As chance would have it, half a year after her silent resolve, a friend made a casual comment. 

"Well, you don't know if you will be together for eternity."

A rush of devotion washed over her, and she threw her arms around her husband's neck. In that moment, there was nothing she wanted more than to be together forever. 

We can be the care givers for one another. Sometimes fueled by duty, other times eagerly we are asked to show up every day.

Because relationships must be fed.