The radio had a program about standardized testing. They compared the value and problems associated with trying to measure student performance. While I have positive memories around filling in the little ovals with a number 2 pencil, some people do not. There is also fuzziness around how I scored. Was it supposed to be a secret? Did my teacher get the results? Did my mother? I don't think I did. Still I anticipated the analogies, and math equations, the topic sentences, and definitions of obscure words. 

Sometimes it helps to measure things using objects you can hold in your hands, rather than numbers. 

"I am eight tomato cans tall."

"My bed is as wide as my arms."

I have a book of children's renditions of recipes. They use  unconventional ways of measuring. "Two inches of salt." "Cook until daddy comes home." "Feeds all of us plus Freddy."

For something as consequential as marriage, it seems odd that there are no measurements. Ever. It is not as if love can move the mercury in a thermometer, or the weights on a scale, but perhaps it would be prudent to at least make a stab at it. 

Prepare Enrich is an inventory that couples can take to find out about their areas of strength and weakness. This is not to impress other people, or win a ribbon, but to better understand what may unfold in your relationship. But the snag is that almost no one steps up for calibration of any description. 

Which makes it dicey to know if we are making progress.