This is an impressive flower. I balk to even peg it as a mere flower since it is probably taller than I am. For those of you who have been reading these daily emails for awhile now, you may recall one about a small pair of leaves a few months back. 

 

I still cannot explain how that puny example of green botany somehow exploded into this bounty of color and texture in such a short time. Water plus dirt plus sunshine plus sunflower seed gets me... this? Is there any other investment you can think of that gives such a generous return?

 

Well, marriage is a fierce competitor for the Best Return for Your Effort award.  But to be candid, my struggles to become a blooming wife have seemed more rigorous than those of the sunflower seed. Although I admit I was not watching 24/7 I detected no sweaty exertion, heard no feisty dialogue about who gets the nitrogen. There was not even any measurable improvement on any given afternoon. In fact, watching too closely makes the progress inconspicuous. 

 

The same is true of my marriage. If I peer at every interaction with John under a microscope, it looks like nothing substantial even happens. But if I can let other things draw my attention for awhile, the lost homework, the strategic plan due on Monday, the catalytic converter, when I come back there is something novel, something beautiful, something bigger than me.

 

 

I guess Time is really an invisibility cloak for the True Gardener. Perhaps it is because I never actually see his fingers, or the paintbrush, or the construction tools he so deftly wields that I paste other labels on what he does.

 

 

 

 

http://www.aweber.com/archive/marriagemoats/1lumu/h/Marriage_Moats_Really_.htm

 

Photo by Andy Sullivan

www.caringformarriage.org