Does anyone really know what they are doing when they leap into life? Who reads the fine print about employment, marriage, or parenting? Not me.

 
When my daughter started work at her first bona fida job she was shocked.
"Why was I in such a hurry to grow up? This is hard."

 

Did I give the impression it was otherwise? 

 

I have been a La Leche League leader since Reagan was in office. I try to lubricate the transition for breastfeeding mothers who have discovered that meeting your newborn's needs is a step up from high school babysitting. Women who were accustomed to Valentino suits and corporate success have been flattened by the preverbal cues of non-ambulatory persons who weigh less than their abandoned briefcases. 

 

Marriage can be a whole new world too. You may have thought it was just a bigger helping of dinners downtown, flirty texts and the undivided attention of your one true love. But for me, the expectation that I will be nice every day of the month is even more chilling than hitting the water on the first day of summer. I could sustain nice when the time involved fit neatly between my other less attractive moods. But kindness gets diluted when you spread it out.

 

I did not know then what the water was really like. But neither did I know that I could learn to swim. 

 

 

www.caringformarriage.org

Photo by Chara Odhner