I visited some friends who have a wonderful garden. Raspberries, blackberries, gooseberries, strawberries, blueberries, rhubarb, cherries, pears, tomatoes, and flowers all grow in their picturesque yard. They told us about the year they waited for the gooseberries to ripen, and their decision to harvest the next day. But in the morning every single berry was gone. Another year when it was time to pit the cherries, they methodically split each one, all eighty cups of them, only to have their neighbor cheerfully offer his automated pitter. 

We picked some blueberries, which were protected by a net. But then we noticed a blackbird had dared to steal some and was entangled for his trespass. 

I find it amazing that fruits ripen at different times, making it possible to enjoy sweetness and flavor over many months. God is thoughtful that way. But it is the task of the gardener to pay attention, to watch, to squeeze, and to smell. 

Relationships ripen at varying times too. I once visited a woman in her eighties on her anniversary, who told me that she had been engaged for less than a week. Her fiance was about to be shipped off to the war, and they wanted to be married first. Another octogenarian told me the story of her mother, whose engagement had lasted five years. 

"It took her that long to embroider the Gibson Girl dress."

I knew of a couple that were engaged, but living three thousand miles apart. She began to feel like her love was becoming over ripe, and that she was growing without him. Abruptly she changed her plans and they moved the wedding up. 

The national average for marrying has risen seven years. It used to be that brides of twenty two were the norm, but now they are closer to thirty. Reasons like college debt, and career goals are at play, 

I am partial to the idea of watching a relationship closely for signs of ripeness. Having tasted both rock hard peaches, and brown bananas I think God has His own timeline.