Last February a woman called crying about her bridesmaid's dress. Even with express shipping it would arrive three days after the May wedding. She wondered if I would be a back up, and make as close a copy as I could if the dress did not arrive in time. 

Against my better judgment I said yes. 

The last time I made bridesmaids dresses I locked myself into a very small box. Since the couple were on a tight budget I said I would make five of them for thirty dollars a piece in three weeks. On what planet did I think I could pull that off? Not only did the women wearing them arrive barely two days before the wedding so would not be in town for a fitting, the pattern had to be modified. There were three different fabrics involved, none of them cotton which is my home turf. 

Why did I say yes? 

It did not go well. 

But this time it was only one dress, and I could pour energy into secretly hoping that the shipping estimate was overly cautious, and the dress would arrive in the nick of time. So when she called last week to say we better go fabric shopping I got sweaty palms. We searched the fabric store and found nothing the right color. Whew, I figured I was off the hook. She would have to call customer service and cry again. But that was not her plan. After searching a different store, she found the right color fabric and lining. We took her measurements and I set to work. 

There was a beautiful ruffle from neck to ankles that I had never seen let alone sewn before. The two inch picture on the David's Bridal website wasn't giving me much constructive help either. But another bridesmaid let me study her gown and I discovered something. It was cut in a spiral. Twenty hours of leaning over the machine later I had a Kelly green dress hanging in my sewing room waiting for a woman to slip it on. 

Sometimes the thought of creating a lovely relationship with no more directions than the script of a romantic comedy makes me want to crumble. Television is not a good model for integrity. But spending time closely observing a committed marriage can give you ideas for how to piece it together. A few days before the wedding a circle of women gathered around a fire pit to express their wisdom. Several spoke of the inversion that happens when we put our partner's needs above our own. 

The result is more lovely than a floor length ruffle.