I am on a number of list serves about autism. Mostly I delete messages unread. But interactions with Benjamin have been rocky lately and I am looking, praying, for guidance.
That means I need to pay attention to potential answers. I started reading the emails.
In the space of a season I will have attended an all day workshop about transitions, an evening lecture by an international speaker, a presentation about social skills, a resource expo, a talk at a local disabilities group, and a training about how to use
videos to modify behavior. I'm also taking him to acupuncture, massage, an ongoing library club, the doctor, a spring dance, a basketball tournament, monthly events put on by a group for kids with challenges, sessions on a bio mat and the prom. I even make him dinner occasionally.
Ben's teacher has responded with enthusiasm whenever I
mention these details. She is after all invested in his success. Maybe she wonders what took me so long.
I cannot be sure that these efforts will help. But I feel a shift within myself in that I am searching. I am less of a victim, and more of a participant. It probably would have been prudent for me to start climbing these ladders before things spiraled out of control. Wisdom
comes at a price.
John and I went out with a couple recently. Their relationship is experiencing friction. I asked what things they are exploring. There was an awkward pause.
"Well,
we are out with you now. And, we read part of a book a few years ago. Um... and we did a couple's event... when was it?" He looked at his wife for help.
Even before she answered I knew the answer. I went to it too. It was during the Bush administration.
It is of course none of my business what anyone does to inform their marriage. Most people are already stressed for time.
Wisdom comes at a price. But so does ignorance.
