Last year we repurposed our trampoline into a chicken pen. All it took was a roll of fencing around it and voila. But when John created a people sized pen named Mossflower the trampoline fell out of use. We dismantled it.

Since we moved it around the yard to access fresh grass, the last place it stood overlapped the path from the front door to the road. Ben travels that path when he waits for the bus, and for months he had to veer around the trampoline, like one of those roundabouts in England. But it has been gone for half a year. 

This morning I watched him walk down the steps and when he got to that part of  the path... he veered. It reminded me of the phantom pain that amputees talk about. He responded to something that wasn't even there. 

There are old patterns that refuse to quit in relationships too. Maybe one of you used to be critical about car trips, or long waits at the store. But even if you make progress in that arena, your spouse may react to behavior that isn't even there. 

As we approach tax day I am mindful of old arguments, and trying to replace them with fresh interactions. Remind me if I forget to stay in the present.