Dogs can sense things that we humans are blind and deaf to. There are bomb sniffing dogs, epilepsy predicting dogs, cancer detecting dogs, and even mutts that know when a girl is starting an allergic reaction. I read Lassie Come Home as a child and adored that she always knew when it was four o'clock, right when the boy she loved was getting out of school. Lassie ached to be there in the schoolyard waiting for him. It fueled her to trudge across Scotland and half of England to lay at his feet, exhausted, filthy and starving. 

As a mother there were times I just knew one of my children was in distress. I could not attribute it to my tongue or fingertips, but the message was knocking on my brain trying to get in. Once I sat up in bed with the sudden knowledge of what our son had done. Another time I wove the fragmented pieces together to realize why our daughter was keeping her distance.

The book Conjugial Love describes a wife's innate ability to know how her husband is feeling, even if those emotions are hidden from him. For a long time I took that brief paragraph as a sign of my ineptness. Know John's feelings? I barely knew where he was until I got the app Friend Finder. I have not yet downloaded one called Feeling Finder. 

But I have begun to believe in my own perception. I can see the subtle indications that John is content, or uncomfortable. It helps me choose the right time to ask him for help, or to reassure him of my love. It gets me to pause and observe before I go barreling in with my own agenda. 

I suppose a wife's perception is indeed inborn, as opposed to something you acquire or bargain for. But muscles are inborn too, and respond much better if you use them.