I was wandering in the book section of my local thrift store when a friend pointed it out as a good read. In the space between Christmas and New Years I opened it up and barely came up for air.
Left Neglected is a powerful novel about a woman whose fast track life is hijacked by a brain injury incurred while she is talking on the phone, while driving in the rain, and crashes. I was absorbed by the window into her corporate world which zoomed on parallel tracks with a marriage and three young children. She can barely manage to stay connected in the minutes squeezed between the last international meeting and kissing her daughter Lucy good
night.
While I am merely embellishing the stream of accolades that are splattered on the inside cover, it is a vivid book about marriage. Sarah and her husband Bob are a team. They face the pressures of demanding jobs and parenting with mutual respect and a sense of humor. When she is flattened by the repercussions of her accident, Bob stands by her. We get to overhear their tough conversations as they untangle decisions no one wants to face. While their life is
more expensive than mine, I care about them and the way they navigate an enormous shift. Oops. They are not real. I forgot.
I was especially grateful to find it on the heels of two other popular books which left me discouraged. Dear John and The Choice are both page turners to be sure, by Nicholas Sparks. I enjoyed his previous novels The Notebook and The Wedding, which both illustrate long term marriages with tenderness and an honest eye.
But while The Choice and Dear John are about enduring love, there is one detail that sours it for me. Their sexual relationship begins after hours of meeting each other.
How is it that this is acceptable?
John Van Epp articulates a model of relationships that is sequential. Knowing, trusting, relying and committing are stages that should precede intimate
touch. Yet the overwhelming message of books like
The Choice are that sex is a great How-d'ye-do?
I much prefer it as a celebration that two people know, trust and are deeply committed to each other.
