I watched a three minute
video by Brene Brown about the distinction between sympathy and empathy. One of the take aways is that sympathy can begin with the connection smashing caveat "at least..." Empathy, by contrast, strives to share the other
person's perspective, articulate their feelings and steer clear of judgment.
When you try to minimize someone else's emotions by drawing attention to the silver lining, it can leave them feeling more isolated than ever. In my experience, when John or a friend listens to me with compassion it brings me closer to finding my own silver lining in the future.
Marriage is a good place to learn empathy. Pain is part of the deal and having someone hear
your truth without chopping it into shoulds or regrets, can bring you closer than a string of sunny days.
Christmas is the pinnacle of empathy. God came down to a hurting world not merely to sympathize but to be with us. Empathy means to feel with. Emmanuel means God with us. Human kind was heavy with oppression at the time of the Lord's birth. People shuddered under the heel of a dictator who thought nothing of infanticide, and darkness was as thick as a shroud.
But into this arena of pain, a innocence arrived.
"The people who have walked in darkness have seen a great light. Those who dwell in the land of the shadow of death, upon them a light has shined." Isaiah 9
