Marriage Moats-Hardware Store
Published: Wed, 04/24/13
| Marriage Moats | Caring for Marriage | ||||
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![]() My son agreed to build a coop for the chickens who are increasingly crowded in the smaller one. We set off for the hardware store, me armed with a credit card and he with a construction education from You Tube. As we wandered through the aisles I thought about how lost some people are in a fabric store. Those who are not familiar with the details surrounding fabric width, or fiber content might be swamped by the bolts of cotton. But I feel confident. Not so when I am surrounded by lumber and metal bolts.
I saw a couple who were in our marriage group a few summers ago, out on a date to buy lawn furniture. We chatted at the check out line as I paid for my cart full of potential.
Zack and I lugged our supplies to the car, and as we were unloading, the cart blocked the car next to us. The owner walked up and I apologized. He smiled and offered to help. I nodded to his compact car.
"Looks like you aren't buying anything big today."
"But I completely redid my kitchen. Just getting a few things. Want to see?" Before I could respond he whipped out his phone and I expected a photo of the finished layout. Instead he went through a slew of a hundred pictures. He started at the demolition.
Zack was now doing all the unloading solo, as I looked at scores of images that prove that this man had completely gutted the room, and piece by piece created a fabulous kitchen. His buttons were popping, and he described the process as he relived it. This man knew the inner workings of the plumbing, electrical wiring, ceramic tiles and back splash. I congratulated him as Zack pushed the last of the planks into the van.
I found it fascinating that he wanted me to see the messy parts. In truth the granite counters and hardwood cabinets were more impressive against the backdrop of scraped floors and orphaned wires leading nowhere. I wonder if a person who walks into the ownership of a well designed kitchen is capable of such pride.
There are couples who are willing to articulate the reconstruction of their marriages. A library of books exist that start with the smashing of old patterns, and methodically chronicle the building of a better home.
Photo by Stephen Conroy
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