This is one of many flash mobs on the internet. What struck me this time was how brave the first woman was. She wheeled her harp into a large hospital in Jerusalem, and began to play. Although she had been told that there would soon be an orchestra to surround her, perhaps her first emotion was one of vulnerability. If no one arrived, she might look foolish or small. But as horn players and flutists poured through the door, the strength of their community began to swell, spilling into the onlookers until they too were dancing and swaying. 

 

Marriage begins with a power surge of community. Everyone who loves you or your parents shows up in their finery to celebrate the union of two people. Their arms are loaded with gifts, their faces glowing with joy. The music begins and you are carried along on the dreams of everyone who holds your name precious. 

 

Then when the party is over, each violinist and oboe player goes home to practice for the cat. It gets lonely again. 

 

Marriage can feel isolated, especially when the topic du jour at the office or car pick up revolves around productivity or prepubescence. Who gets to hear the music of another relationship when we close our doors?

 

Flash mobs require intentionality. People show up because they agreed to. Creating community in marriage takes design as well. But all the bother of scheduling and inconvenience is lost in the swirling euphoria of being part of a mob of couples who showed up to celebrate marriage. 

 

 

Photo by Jenny Stein

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