The minister this week spoke of blessings. He also gestured them, by teaching us the ASL sign for it. We pinched our fingers at our lips, and spread them out toward people around us. When he invited the children around him to bless the congregation, they did not hesitate. No one doubted him, even though their pockets were empty. The capacity to bless others is instantly available, though sometimes we grown-ups forget that. 

 

This Venn Diagram that Benjamin crafted still makes me smile. It captures the similarities and differences he notices in dessert. Ben uses pictures of sweet things as symbols, when he tells his family about human characteristics. He understands that kindness is as delicious as chocolate pudding. Which is why he has a special drawer for the treats he gives to my sewing students. Kids are often startled to see a large man with five o'clock shadow shoving a cookie in their face, precisely when they are intent on attaching a button. I reassure them that it is safe. 

 

Ben is generous with blessings. If the sun is setting, and there will be no more children coming, he goes to his cache and brings out two yummy things. One for him, and one for me. 

 

When he went with his brothers to Disneyland, Ben had a debit card. I told him that he could buy things, or pay for lunch. But the only time he pulled it out was to purchase a big Winnie the Pooh bear for his best friend. He knew she would love it, and she does. 

 

There are milestones that have no relevance in Ben's life. A salary, financial prowess, keys to the car, are not in his future. I used to grieve the loss. But in the space left behind from their absence, Ben is making room for blessings.