I was reading about an interchange between a married couple in the book For Women Only that makes me laugh.

Jeff and his wife Shaunti are chatting about whether visual images pop up in unexpected ways.

Jeff- Think of a movie star that you find physically attractive. Like Tom Cruise. After we've seen a movie with him in it how many times will that attractive image rise up in your mind the next day?

Shaunti- Never.

Jeff- I must not be explaining myself correctly. I mean how many times will a thought of what he looked like  with his shirt off sort of pop into your head?

Shaunti-Never.

Jeff- Never... As in never?

Shaunti- Zero times. It just doesn't happen.

Jeff- (Long pause) Wow.

The chapter continues describing how the overwhelming majority of men are pelted with images of beautiful women like a slideshow. It arrives unbidden in a reflex that precedes thought. Men trying to to shun lust  have to work relentlessly to reign in the impulse. For teens and young men the struggle can be nearly constant. Some have concocted diversionary tactics like lists of household chores. It sounds exhausting.

Yet the book goes on with areas of hope. A man whose gaze is hijacked by the girl walking by in tight pants is not necessarily disrespectful of his wife. It does not have to subtract from his love for her.

Jeff and Shaunti offer a few suggestions like expressing gratitude. If Jeff is watching a show when an alluring woman comes on, and he averts his eyes, Shaunti thanks him. Jeff says it matters.

They also believe that the power of prayer can protect their marriage.

As do I.