I read that an airline is implementing Compassion Training classes for its employees. In recent years there have been incidents that went badly between staff and customers, and with the unwanted coverage spreading across social media, something had to be done.
A book I am reading outlines the impact of what the author calls
The Kindness Challenge. Participants agree to do three things every day for a month: avoid negative comments, replace them with praise, and offer gestures of generosity.
It's a dynamic trio, really. Frankly I would be shocked if there were no impact. The stats about improved relational satisfaction are impressive, even with only half of each couple putting in the effort. It turns out that kindness, like orneriness, is contagious.
It appears that such things are learnable. People can be taught what complaining looks like, and how to avoid it. Like puppies being trained to obey, adults can have their behavior modified for the better. Starting with an agreement to try helps too.
One story in the book is about a pair of coworkers whose constant bickering led their boss to make an ultimatum: be cordial or get fired. With stakes like that they found out just how embedded snark was in their interactions.
This week a woman was telling me about some of the conflicts happening in her daughter's school.
"Can't we teach children better ways to get along? It's as important as math."
Her words gave me the nudge I needed to work on the upcoming marriage conference. Next February we will offer a program of workshops designed to pump positive energy into your relationship. Some are aimed at having fun, like cooking together, or painting. Another gives couples a chance to craft their own wooden stand for the Bible. It seems that being creative leaves less room for nit picking.
